I know that I have not posted barely anything on here in months. I actually haven’t really written much in months. Here is why:
Starting in July, I kept getting sick randomly. Headaches occurring more often than ever before, exhaustion constantly sweeping over me, and out-of-the-blue nausea and vomiting spells. The beginning of this coincided with my summer internship that I had to drive 45 minutes to almost 7 days a week. Needless to say, it sucked, but I did what I could to make it work in between hospital and doctor visits. Fast forward to a couple of weeks later, the beginning of the fall semester of my senior year of college. I am living with my bestfriend in an apartment off campus and we are ready to have an amazing year. BAM, Friday afternoon one week I get a migraine that won’t go away no matter what. The following Thursday, after almost passing out in class, my roommate drove me to the ER where they found that my pituitary gland was enlarged. Cool, so now what? After bloodwork and an MRI, they found that my hormone levels were elevated. Yes, get your laughs in, my hormones are crazy! But really, it is a pretty frustrating thing. After some medication changes, I am starting to feel slightly normal again, so hopefully that was the cause of this ruckus.
What is the point of this story exactly? Honestly, probably the biggest cliche in existence; never give up. Typically, I am a very upbeat and happy person. Having a chronic illness for any period of time is exhausting, especially as a college student. My headaches were so bad that I could not study or write papers. I could not eat normally because I was constantly feeling sick. I could not hangout with my friends, except for on my couch, because I was always tired. I could not go to the gym or ride horses because of all of the above. I could not do any of the things that I needed or wanted to do as a college student, and it happened at the beginning of my senior year. I know, fun times. A few days ago, I finally hit the point of frustration. I was mad at the world for throwing this difficulty at me and I wanted nothing to do with being strong anymore. I was done. After taking a nap and waking up on a better side of the bed, I had an epiphany. I told myself to get over it. Yes, I am still frustrated, and yes, I am ready to be caught up in all of my classes, and yes, I hate feeling horrible just as much as anyone else does. But as always, life goes on.
One day, I will look back at this and laugh at the imperfect timing of my pituitary gland’s confusion, but for now, I will just keep moving forward.